Every year there is a huge Sikh festival in Squamish that, as far as I understand, commemorates the martyrdom of the fifth guru. Despite my lack of Sikh religious knowledge, but given my keen power of observation, I can only assume it is a siginifcant holy day.

What I do know ... the Sikh community sets up all these tents and tables, and they give out a LOT of free orange food ...

So, and I say this with sincere respect and cultural appreciation, given my potato-eating, prone-to-sunburning, boring Anglo-saxon heritage ... I TOTALLY support remembering the martyrdom of the fifth Sikh guru on a yearly basis ...

So, want to hear something totally awesome? My podunk hippie little British Columbian town, which apparently boasts a 15 per cent Francophone population, had a big St-Jean Baptiste celebration for the first time ever this year. They closed down the main downtown street, and there were local French musicians and vendors, and Québecois cuisine, and of course a beer garden.

Now, I was expecting typical Québec fares, like poutine and tortière and steamed hot dogs and maple sugar. But I almost jumped out of my shoes when I saw one of the vendors selling what I realized was the gastronomical synopsis of my youth: Jos. Louis' cakes and cans of Pepsi.

Even I, a staunch Coca-Cola loyalist, could crack open a Pepsi and raise a glass on this particular day. I giggled my way down the street, Jos. Louis and Pepsi in hand.

When I first saw the posters up around town, I was totally excited, but one has to wonder how successful a festival celebrating the ostensible and controversial "nationalism" of a province on the other side of the country could possibly be.

But, man, you gotta love Squish, because this community comes out in droves for whatever festival, party, parade or celebration is happening, rain or shine, night or day, bilingual or not. It was straight-up wicked, and frankly, probably the best St. Jean Baptiste celebration I have ever been to, inside or outside of Québec. Why? Because this party was about sharing cultures and just plain having fun. It wasn't about politics, or ethnicities, and there were no language battles like some of the festivities I attended in my youth. No one yelled at me "Anglo go home!"

There was just a relaxed flow of French and English and great accents in both languages and poutine and tortière and Pepsis and Jos. Louis' and music and dancing and hoola hoops, and good grief, there was even a huge French flag hanging from my favourtie clothes shop in town. Like, a France French flag. Why? Oh, who knows, probably because this was a celebration of French things, and that is a French flag, and so it's a perfect decoration. But who the hell cares? The shop owner was totally excited about her Québec flag hanging on the one side, and her huge French flag on the other, and proudly pointed them both out to me. And while you are not likely to see such decor at a "real" St-Jean Baptiste celebration in a "real" Québecois town, the spirit was bang on, and made it the most real Fête de la St-Jean I've ever been to.

LOVE it!

...

Yesterday was the grand opening of the 2010 Olympic Volunteer Centre, which is in Squamish. To celebrate they were having a big parking lot party, and I was invited, as a representative of local athletes, to give a quick speech.

What? What's that you ask? Who else was invited to speak? Oh, you know ... the mayor, our MLA, a representative of the Prime Minister, VANOC executive vice president ... oh right, and me, 3rd year development skeleton athlete. Hmm ... I feel like I have been here before ...

Even better, I was was supposed to take the stage with a member of the silver medal-winning 1996 Olympic synchronized swimming team. At least then people could have looked at her shiny hardware, and listened to the wisdom of a veteran athlete. But she was unable to make it, and so yeah ... it was just me up there. I brought along my Excellence Level Canada Fitness badge, in case someone wanted to touch it ...

All in all, it turned out to be a fun day. I brought my sled for kids to lie on and I am pretty sure that there are now at least 50 more people to whom I don't have to explain what my sport is.

And Jason got a lovely hat.

Also, I think there might have been a reason I have heard nothing but "Michelle, stand up straight" from my father for my ENTIRE life ...

So I am driving up to Whistler yesterday, minding my own business, rocking out to talk radio (CBC's Search Engine with Jesse Brown, if you really want to know) when all of the sudden every single car in front of me (a good five or six vehicles) slam on their brakes and pull over to the side of the road. So of course I follow suit, thinking, geez, there must be a horrible accident, or maybe there's a police chase or perhaps a small airplane is landing on the highway.

A few seconds go by, and there are no sirens or explosions or car crashes, and I begin wondering what's going on, when out of the corner of my eye, what saunters into view?

A black bear.

A stupid bear? This is what the drama is all about?

It's a good thing all y'all (thank you, four years of university gymnastics with a Texan ... ) slammed on the brakes and very nearly caused a massive pileup that WOULD have involved explosions and sirens. Too bad you didn't succeed. At least the poor saps behind us would have something worth looking at when they pulled over to the side of the road behind you tools.

So, muttering under my breath, I hit the gas and blow by all these giddy, clueless tourists. (They had better be tourists ... if I find out that any Sea-To Sky corridor residents are pulling stunts like that for something they can see out their back window, I'll have more than just a blog posting for them ... )

So wait, you ask yourself, if you didn't pull over to gawk at Smokey here, then how come there's a lovely shot of the bear leading off this post?

Okay, well two hours later I am driving home from Whistlerr, minding my own business, rocking out to talk radio (Apologetics.com ... ) when I happen upon an oncoming section of the highway with a lineup of cars pulled over to side. And who is there, wandering around, but the SAME STUPID BEAR.

Now before you call me out for pulling over and taking pictures, let's review the facts:

1. Obviously, the only reason I needed to take a picture (or twenty) was to accompany this blog posting. So the stop was strictly business.
2. As I approached said business opportunity and realized the necessity of diverting from my original route, I calmly checked my rearview mirror. Upon seeing that there wasn't a single vehicle behind me, I applied pressure to my right hand turn signal, and gently coaxed my wagon out of the flow of traffic and onto the shoulder of the road, at which time I activated my hazard signals to notify any approaching travellers of abnormal conditions.
3. I DIDN'T DO THIS:

Yeah. Brilliant. Maybe move in a little closer. They like to be scratched right underneath their chin, just like one of your 18 cats.

Hey lady, here's a hint. BEARS EAT YOU. Maybe you want to go out in a blaze of glory, but the rest of us living around this area would prefer to die in our sleep, as opposed to ending up half digested in the stomach of a black bear. If you want to get close and cuddly with ol' Ursus Americanus here, try the zoo, or maybe the circus. I hear they have a fabulous dancing bear act. But stop teaching our wild bears that humans are harmless (and apparently stupid).

But, wait, MiloMacsters. It gets better.

After completing my business photo shoot from a safe distance, across the road and ... oh I don't know ... INSIDE MY CAR, I continue on my merry way back to Squamish. And I am just getting back into my rockin' talkin' radio, when what catches my eye?

That's right, maybe a kilometer up the road, this time on my side, Smokey's cousin is out snackin' on some grass (a common provincial passtime... )

So, for purely business reasons of course, I carefully and responsibly check all my mirrors, signal and pull to the side of the road. As I am sitting there quietly IN MY CAR, who pulls up in front of me, hops out and starts snapping away on her camera phone? ARE YOU KIDDING? One tussle with death per day is not enough for you?

I don't even want to know how and why you were originally headed north on the road and now you are headed south, because I am fairly certain that it must have involved an illegal u-turn in the middle of a four-land highway. So yeah, uh ... dont' mind me back here. I am just going to wait until you have cleared out before I continue on home.

Oh, also. If you are going to be a moron, and wander within 10m of a bear to take a picture, at least have the decency to use a high end camera and not your crappy 1.2 megapixel camera phone. If you are volunteering to go out in a blaze of glory while endangering all the residents and tourists that come through the corridor, then I want to see it in 600-dpi, poster-sized prints.

• Bear Aware British Columbia
• Bear Aware Education
• Get Bear Smart Society
• BC Environment - Bear Safety
  

Should I be surprised that the day after I got home from Calgary this is what I woke up to?

Don't get me wrong, I am not complaining, for the following stellar reasons:

1) I don't have to shovel the puddle, unlike those of my family members currently digging themselves out in Eastern Canada.

2) I don't have to collect the puddle in tank for drinking water, unlike those of my thirsty family members in Australia.

Ha. What do you all think of Squamish now? What's that? You'd like to visit? Hmmm ... sorry, I think we are full.